Gay Times

A blogger that I frequent wrote recently about her husband and his friends having a good time cooking for their wives. She added that she hesitates to use the phrase to the nature of “they had a gay time.” In this day and age, I can imagine.


Her blog post brought a wave of memories. When I was a little girl, my parents gave me a key chain with my first and middle name engraved that I kept my house key on. It was a large key chain and easy to read. I remember standing in line for lunch with the other children and they mocked my name.


That night I held my key chain and asked Mom, “Why did you give me this name?” Mom looked at me and said, “It’s a lovely name. Why do you ask?” I held the key chain out to her and said, “Couldn’t you have just put only my first name on this?” I remember that look in her eyes, that Only Mother’s Can Know look.


Mom said, “Did you know that it is MY middle name too?” I was shocked. I guess as a little girl, Mom’s name was… well.. Mom. I asked, “Did you have to give me that middle name though?” She prodded a little more, “Did someone at school say something?”


I didn’t want to tell her anything, because it was her name too, “There’s a boy that says – It’s not Aleta Gay Grimball – It’s Aleta the GAY Grimball.”

Mom asked me if I knew what the word meant and I shook my head, "No." I was a naive child, (that’s not such a bad things in the cruelty of children).


Mom explained, “This is what I want you to tell the boy when he makes fun of you again….”


The next day during recess, I was walking with a friend of mine, telling her what the boy said to me and what Mom told me. Not minutes later, I saw the boy coming towards me, I remember almost hoping he would say something.

He didn’t disappoint and repeated the “You are the Gay Grimball” comment as he walked by me. I swung around and said loudly, “Yes, I AM Gay! That means HAPPY! It’s a shame that YOU aren’t GAY!”

I still chuckle to remember that boy’s expression. His eyes got round as saucers and his mouth dropped open. He didn’t know how to respond. I turned around and walked away, with friends cheering for me. That boy never teased me again. I was never ashamed of my name after that.

Now, though, when Mom introduces herself (as she always goes by her middle name, not her first name), Mom says, “Hi, I’m Gay. That’s my name, I’m not.” People laugh and then they are Ok with it.

When Greg found out about my middle name, he liked it. Sometimes he’ll call out, “Aleta Gay.” I don’t know, it’s something about the way it sounds from him, from him lips ~ he makes it sound so pretty!


If we ever have a daughter, I’d be honored to pass that legacy to her. I’d want her to be Gay.


Dictionary: gay – adjective: having or showing a merry, lively mood; synonyms: gleeful, jovial, glad, joyous, happy, cheerful, sprightly, light-hearted, vivacious, frolicsome ~ when hearts were young and gay

** Edited to add this: Please know that this post isn't reflective of any view regarding a person's lifestyle. I'm a live and let live person.